Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Adventures In Hyper-Reality (1): by Peter Culshaw

Here's a story I was so inspired by I wrote a song about it -

ARKANSAS CITY (EAP) -- A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after leaping through her moving car's sunroof during an incident best described as a "mistaken rapture" by dozens of eye-witnesses.

Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty-car pile-up resulted from people trying to avoid hitting the woman, who was apparently convinced the rapture was occurring when she saw twelve people floating up into the air, and then passed a man on the side of the road who she believed was Jesus.

"She started screaming `He´s back! He´s back!´ and climbed out through the sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said Everet Williams, husband of 28-year-old Georgann Williams who was pronounced dead at the scene. "I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped," Williams said. "She thought the rapture was happening and was convinced that Jesus was gonna lift her up into the sky," he went on to say.

"This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the force," said Paul Madison, first officer on the scene. Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus anddiscovered that he was on his way to a toga costume party, when the tarp covering the bed of his pickup truck came loose and released twelve blow-up sex dolls
filled with helium, which then floated up into the sky.

Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his friends that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into the air in frustration and said "Come back," just as the Williams' car passed him, and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people up into heaven as they drove by him. "I think my wife loved Jesus more than she loved me," the widower said when asked why his wife would do such a thing. When asked for comments about the twelve sex dolls, Jenkins replied, "This is all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like this to happen."

'And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music' - Friederich Nietzsche (1844-1900)

JESUS ON THE HIGHWAY

She thought she saw Jesus by the highway
But it was just another guy in fancy dress
Sometimes you really should get a second opinion
Sometimes a cowboy is really an indian

He said: Come Back Come Back
She thought it was the Rapture, the Rapture

She saw the figures float in the sky
Towards the light shining a mile up
She said "He's back" and jumped through her sun-roof of her car
And caused a twenty car highway pile-up

He said: Come Back Come Back
She thought it was the Rapture, the Rapture

She thought they were the Redeemed
But things were not what they seemed
They were plastic fantastic blow-up dolls
For lonely guys to play when the girlfriends away

He said Come Back Come Back
She thought it was the Rapture, The Rapture

Her husband didn't seem too surprised
Said - she always loved Jesus more than me
But the moral of the story is clear
If you don't get it it will cost you dear
Sometimes things just aint what they seem
And if you see the Lord tonight you might feel the fear
But bear in mind this lady's story
It's probably a just a guy on the way to a party

He said Come Back Come Back
She thought it was the Rapture the Rapture
And those who were seen dancing
were thought insane
By those who could not hear the music


EDITORIAL FOOTNOTE:

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